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"better go back at once," i thought, as if the horses
were summoning me to the return journey, yet i
permitted the patient's sister, who faniced that i
was dazed by the heat, to take my fur coat from me.
~franz kafka

so there i was, defending a merciless attack from the united states. it was a most brutal and relentless attack. first alberta fell, then quebec, then ontario. the u.s. attacked from the east and the west. the terrible red spread itself like a weed up from the south, surging up from argentina. we fought over alberta, like tyrants do; alberta changed back and forth so many times it was like the middle east. my army could not hold any longer, the red was just too busy handing its eight-year-olds WMD; something my army would never allow. my scouts alerted me to another push northward from the united states (from the newly formed army of south america) i left was armies i could in alaska and brought my forces westward to kamchatka. if i could not have north america, i would advance fearlessly into asia.

the red (mostly comprised of dirty mexicans) witnessed heavy losses while undertaking their overthrow of the rest of n.a. ontario and quebec had chopped the s.a army in half. we did what we could, but the reds finally destroyed my forces in alaska. the bitter cold that my people were used to had little effect on those dirty spics. news reached my ears that europe was advancing on egypt and north africa. north africa was also having a time, as it was being attacked also from the west by the army of s.a. small carrier pigeons carried the news that the middle east had changed hands from europe and africa so many times it was hard to tell if it was a sovereign state at all. once or twice it was also occupied by the asians, and most notably by the australians (who had talked of taking over the middle east only for fun!). by the time my army lost alaska, australia's light was beginning to wane, asia was becoming too powerful.

i received word by messenger bears from siberia that europe was attacking from all fronts (it most be noted that siberian messenger bears were not as friendly as the alaskan ones). europe, after breaking into africa (mostly for slave trade profits), also removed the asian armies in the middle east, india and then the australian armies that occupied siam. without more then a second thought europe wiped out the armies of australia (who put up a very weak fight).

however forceful europe's spread was, all the more was asia's. asia exploded into the ukraine and then south through siam and further into australia, leaving europe clinging onto iceland and scandinavia to the north. with africa fully occupied by the s.a. army (as well as all of n.a.), the rest of the world was ready to fall.

the south american army pushed through alaska and forced my army to surrender in kamchatka. we then learned that they pushed down from greenland into europe bringing total annihilation. then they spread east forcing asia to hold onto australia alone. it was about this time (as told to me from the squidy messengers) that the last african stronghold in (of all places) japan had finally given up it's territory to the ever forward advancement of the s.a. army.

after spreading itself so thin, the s.a. army reluctantly held it's position just outside of new guinea, leaving west and east australia to play with their boomerangs in peace. i give this up to the s.a. army's laziness (as i am still believe that it is largely comprised of dirty mexicans.

about me

  • i'm billiam
  • from prague, Czechia
  • where capital letters have been executed! let's see... i really dislike sunny days. i love precipitation of all kinds. snow is my favorite. i wish that it could be no more than fifty degrees fahrenheit, and clouds covering the sky. i enjoy friends and beer- in that order. i dislike wearing shirts. my random thoughts and unanswerable questions keep me up at night. when i sleep i have dreams; long epic dreams. i believe that it is important to be fit in mental, physical, and emotional capacities. any food worth eating should be as organic as possible, without additives that have letters p, k, x, c, h in close proximity without vowels. save a cow- eat a vegetarian.
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